Podcast

 
Episode 62: SKINCARE REVELATIONS, DAD JOKES & MUCKY KNICKERS

We’re taking part in the Leicester Comedy Festival this weekend so Jennie wants to road test some gags. Apologies. Amy has discovered something incredible about overpriced beauty creams in her quest to stop the ageing process and why our Valentines involved board games and mucky knickers.

Episode 61: PANXIETY, CRYING IN YOGA & LOCKDOWN DATING STEPS UP A NOTCH

Jennie (and the UK) is in need of a pep talk as lockdown takes it toll, triggering Panxiety (trade marking that). Why yoga has got emotional, Amy has a novel way of having a clear out and lockdown dating has gone extra. We learn of ways it’s really been spruced…

Episode 60: AMYS FLIRTING WITH TRADESMEN, KIDS FROM SCHOOL YOU CAN’T FORGIVE & JENNIE IS FINALLY SHOCKED

Lockdown is taking its toll as Amy resorts to inappropriately flirting with tradesmen in front of her boyfriend. Some of which is caught live on this episode!  The kids from school you can never forgive, why sea shanties can nob off and Jennie is finally shocked to the core. Plus…

Episode 59: AMY GOT COVID, LOCKDOWN BEAUTY & WHY DO WE HATE TRENDS?

Amy got the gift of covid for Christmas and was taken by surprise. Trying to find the positives of lockdown 3. Jennie’s new at home salon and why we struggle to get on board with trends.

Episode 58: WHY WE’RE LIVING TOGETHER, PANTS AND WAP

Life has got real weird for us both now that we’re living in each others homes. A very passionate debate about pants reaches a conclusion, Jennie finally watches and reviews ‘Elf’ and we rebrand WAP.  Also-another dilemma from you, hopefully solved! Introducing TNBD 

Episode 57: LOCKDOWN DATING, BEAVERS, TOGS AND DENIERS

Sharing many of your bizarre lockdown dating experiences, including a man who made a very odd request in the middle of a tunnel.  Jennie upsets Amy with her lack of festivities & opinions on Home Alone. Plus a very unexpected revelation about beavers and a check in on togs and…

Episode 56: NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE, LOCKDOWN BIRTHDAYS AND COPYCATS

Jennie celebrated her birthday in a rather unique way, by narrowly escaping death. How we’re celebrating lockdown birthdays this month, with a big announcement for you! And Amy confesses to copying something of Jennies, the big copycat, but does she mind?   Plus a giveaway this episode-more details on our…

Episode 55: REBRANDING LOCKDOWN, PETTY ARGUMENTS & FACE FILTERS

On the cusp of lockdown 2, we’ve got a way to rebrand it and make it positive. Your stories of petty arguments were outstanding and even shocked Jennie to the core. Plus we delve into why we’re really using filters on instagram.

Episode 54: A LIFE CHANGING BRA & THE PROBLEM WITH ‘THE SECRET’

Amy’s finally found the perfect solution to never wearing a bra again. How we behave during rows when you know you’re in the wrong and why the self help book ‘The Secret’ changes most people’s lives for the better, but it’s ruining Amy’s. Plus Jennie explains what you actually do…

Episode 53: ANNIVERSARY EXPECTATIONS, TOILET HUMOUR AND WUETUBE

Amy just celebrated her anniversary, but was in for quite a surprise when arriving at their hotel. Jennie lowers the tone with anniversary expectations and an unsavoury moment in Claridges. Far too much toilet humour for one episode plus the return of Wue! 

Episode 52: AWAKENINGS, VAJACIALS & A NEW CAREER

You think 2020 is weird enough, then you discover Vajacials.  Jennie has a horrifying discovery whilst on her staycation in a treehouse, but has an awakening whilst at Stonehenge.  Amy has a new pet rat, is embarking on a new career and has discovered a very unique way of staying…

Episode 51: KEEPING UP WITH THE KARENS

We’ve all heard of what a ‘Karen’ is now, right? Well, Amy think’s Jennie needs to be a bit more Karen after a recent hair disaster. We rebrand Karen to a Carol. Plus, despite us having polar opposite opinions on psychics/mediums, we both had experiences with them in the last…

PATREON

Hi Blondies, want to support us on Patreon? By doing so, you not only help keep this podcast going, but you get (depending on your tier of donation), a TNB sticker, a bonus weekly episode, and if you shell out a teeny bit more, a mention for you or your…

Episode 50: THE COMEBACK

Blondies! We’re back, but better. We’ve been beavering away to deliver on the promises we made you. We had proper meetings and everything!   Talking our rebrand, why Jennie ended up looking like a sex doll, we’ve got a giveaway for you and the best and worst comebacks. One of…

WE’RE BACK. And we’re better.

We’re back. Same, but better. We’ve been busy blondies, so if you’re a regular then you’ll be possibly surprised, but equally excited about our developments.    If you’ve just discovered Two Non Blondes, then jump on board! There’s plenty of episodes for you to go back and binge on. Just…

Episode 49: LOCKDOWN FATIGUE, DATING A MAN WITHOUT A TV & THE NEW MRS HINCH

The effects of lockdown are starting to grind, BUT some good news for all. Amy has discovered all the things she’s truly crap at during lockdown. Jennie has uncovered the new Mrs Hinch and the big question-would you date a guy who doesn’t own a tv?

Episode 48: COVID EMOTIONS, CYCLING SHORTS & MOUSTACHES

Anyone else realised the phases of lockdown are similar to that of a break up? Our ongoing coping mechanisms and routines during the pandemic. Also learning why we shouldn’t be tampering with our bodies. Cycling shorts and moustaches have made an appearance in our lives, plus Amy has a massive…

Episode 47: THE PANDEMIC EPISODE

What a bizarre time since Coronavirus took hold. We attempt to offer some light relief in these extraordinary times. In the form of; extreme snacking, becoming ‘isolation body ready’, how we’re finding it at home and after some toe curling celebrity moments, why this may level out the playing field. 

Episode 46: BINGE EATING, TROLLS & BEING KIND

Jennie’s been juicing! But makes Amy feel better about what she constitutes as a ‘binge’ eating session. Why do Mum’s comment on our weight? Why we think we were so deeply affected by the tragic news about Caroline Flack. And trying to understand why people troll, what we can do…

Episode 45: VALENTINES SPECIAL; FOR THE SINGLES & THE SMUGS

Love it or loathe it? Either way, why Amy believes you’ve already had your worst valentine. The ultimate guide for making the most of it, whether single or smug. The times we decided to do a strip, failing at being sexy, oh and Amy’s gone right off the rails. 

Episode 44: WITCHCRAFT, FACETIME CONFESSIONS & GEOFF FROM BYKER GROVE

Our first episode of 2020 is here! What Amy’s doing too much of in January, cleansing our homes with witchcraft, Jane McDonald updates and an upsetting revelation from Jennie regarding Geoff from Byker Grove.  Plus, you’ll never un-hear what Jennie confesses about FaceTime. 

Episode 43: FESTIVE FOMO, WHY JENNIE HATES HOME ALONE & SENDING NUDES

The Christmas episode 2019! Happy Christmas blondies. Discussing our personal highlights & lowlights of the year. Why Jennie hates Home Alone, sending nudes and feeling the festive fomo.

Episode 42: JUICE DETOX, THONGS & JENNIE’S BIG NEWS

How Amy got on living on just juice for a week, why thongs bring up painful memories for Jennie & why life is about to really change for her with a big announcement! 

Episode 41: BIRTHDAYS, TURMERIC TITS AND THE PROBLEM WITH HOT TUBS

With us both being Scorpios and with Mercury in retrograde, passions (and rage) are high for us both! We’re also about to embark on two very different holidays, the unexpected things you can catch from hot tubs and why Amy should now be known as Turmeric tits. 

Episode 40: SKIN & WEIGHT REVELATIONS, CANNIBALISM & SMALL TALK

Amy’s started to think the benefits of exercise are a myth, we accidentally veer into that tricky topic of cannibalism and does anybody enjoy small talk? Yes. Jennie. Also if you have a wooden sign in your home saying ‘live, love, laugh’ you will be offended. 

Episode 39: AMY IN HOSPITAL, SELF HEALING & HYPOCHONDRIACS

Amy ended up in hospital unexpectedly, but then struggled to leave. We’ve become fascinated by self healing & the power of making ourselves better & why we immediately fear the worst when we get ill but feel like we’re over reacting if we go to the Doctor.  Plus Jennie sets…

Episode 38: JENNIE GOT MUMPS, CBD OIL & PEGGY RUINS EVERYTHING

An update on our digital detox and how it changed our lives. Jennie brings back a retro disease, Amy does the stupidest thing on holiday. Plus the life changing difference of CBD oil on anxiety and why the moon is depressed.  Ps-Apologies for Peggy Sue interrupting. Showing off.

Episode 37: DIGITAL DETOX, FRENCH TUCKS AND HATE LIKES

Jennie wants to throw her phone out the window as is tired of digital life. Amy’s sporting a french tuck. Plus bumbags, political liking on social media and obligatory Jane McDonald chat.

Episode 36: A BAD WEEK AND A NEW BOYFRIEND

Jennie has a new boyfriend! And that’s not her only news… Why Amy had more drama in the last week than the entire year, eyelashes and eyebrows, why Love Island has taught us it’s better to be average looking and an insta-rant.

Episode 35: BOWEL BABE Part 2

Continuing out chat with podcaster, columnist and influencer, Deborah James (aka Bowel Babe), from the podcast ‘You, Me and The Big C’.  Debs is living with Stage 4 bowel cancer and is constantly battling to stay alive, but with such vigour! Discussing how you deal with the tricky news of…

Episode 35: DEATH, BOWEL BABE AND JANE MCDONALD

This week, Jennie’s had another life change. Plus we launch into a pretty savage attack on the Co-op, get stuck into Game of Thrones (no spoilers), bin bags, Jane McDonald and death.  We’re also joined by the incredibly inspiring podcaster, columnist and influencer, Deborah James (aka Bowel Babe), from the…

Episode 34: AMANDA BYRAM Part 2

Our second part of our chat with the fabulous Amanda Byram. Talking turning 40 and being single, setting up a business, health and beauty tips and Amanda’s most shocking lookalike

Episode 34: JENNIES BIG NEWS & AMANDA BYRAM Part 1

Apologies for the delayed episode, but all will be explained, as Jennie has news! Also TV presenter extraordinaire and all round hoot Amanda Byram joins us. Talking The Big Breakfast days, why she offended David Hasselhoff, cancelling a wedding, being single at 40 and SO much more!

Episode 33: AMY’S BIG NEWS

This week, Amy has taken the plunge on a huge life changing decision! Plus, why we’re getting into country music and Cardi B, Dirty John, Amy keeps lying and cold water swimming.

Episode 32: SHOUT OUT TO MY EX

Seeing as it’s almost Valentines, we open up our Ex files! We lovingly dissect some disasters and behaviour we thought was perfectly normal at the time.  Also, our most explosive debate over musicals, Tupperware parties and Jane Mcdonald.

Episode 31: NEW YEAR, NEW LIPS

Jennie’s had her lips done and Amy’s feeling uncomfortable about it. Our other changes so far for 2019; Is Jennie still vegan? Why did Amy spend £17 on a deodorant? Was the 10 year challenge the worst part of 2019 so far? And we hear a story no-one wanted to…

Episode 30: THE CHRISTMAS EPISODE

Merry Christmas blondies! Is it better being single or coupled up at Christmas? Attempting to make Jennie more festive, the weirdest thing we all do on Christmas Day and why Amy’s boyfriend is maybe a bit too Christmas.

Episode 29: LOSING YOUR JOB AND LIFE LESSONS

Amy opens up about losing her show and acquiring a new one. Discussing the life lessons you learn along the way when decisions are made out of your control and how it benefits you. Plus Jennie living life as a 30 year old, love life update and we manage to…

Episode 28: JENNIES RELATIONSHIP STATUS & GUT HEALTH. With guests, The Mac Twins.

A pretty unexpected update from Jennie’s love life and the last episode before she turns 30. Plus, ever suffered from IBS, stress, anxiety, depression, acne, arthritis?? Then listen to this episodes special guests, Alana and Lisa, aka the Mac Twins, who run ‘The Gut Stuff’. We learnt so much about…

Episode 27: DATING DISASTERS

Jennie has a development in her love life which emerged after another shocking date idea. And after such a reaction from our stories of dreadful dates, you got in touch with yours. Wow, what a world the dating landscape is! From a man who wrote a blog post about a…

Episode 26: DATING AFTER A BREAK UP

We delve into that tricky transition of seeing people after a serious relationship as Jennie embarks on the dating scene! Amy is left not just shocked, but terrified by one of Jennie’s online dating experiences and we share our worst dating disasters.

Episode 25: THE DARK SIDE OF FAME-PART 2. With Matt Richardson.

Part 2 of our chat with comedian and presenter Matt Richardson on life pressures for a man, the dark side of fame and how you shouldn’t feel down about where you are in life. 

Episode 25: THE DARK SIDE OF FAME-PART 1. With Matt Richardson.

This week we follow on from Jennie’s fear of turning in 30 and the sense that she’s not where she thought she’d be in her life. Your responses made us and hopefully will make others feel better! PLUS we have a special guest; comedian and presenter Matt Richardson. Discussing getting…

Episode 24: FEAR OF AGEING. Jennie’s turning 30.

Three weeks after her break up, we see where Jennie’s at-the break up backlash! Our struggle wth ageing, why Amy slapped her boyfriend, and after Jennie dyes her hair, do blondes have more fun?    

Episode 23: THE BREAK UP

There’s been a major life change for one non blonde. So this episode we discuss relationships, heartbreak and how to deal with it. 

Episode 22: AMY, CATE BLANCHETT AND SANDRA BULLOCK IN A ROOM. It does not end well.

Amy met Hollywood royalty Cate Blanchett, who managed to offend her. What we’re learning from Love Island, being accidentally disrespectful to Paul McCartney & Mick Jagger, Jennie shocks Amy to the core and a comprehensive review of our favourite service stations.     

Episode 21: COMEDY AND PORN. With guest Tiff Stephenson.

This weeks special guest is comedian, actress and all round brilliant brain, Tiffany Stevenson. We discuss being a woman in comedy, her roles from ‘The Office’ to ‘People Do Nothing’. Along with a bit of a chat about porn, trolls and some hilarious yet worst things about being a woman. …

Episode 20: AMY SCHUMER JOINS TWO NON BLONDES!

How we influenced the Royal Wedding, PMT helpline and we’re joined by stand up comedian, actress, producer, writer, New York times bestseller and all round utterly brilliant Amy Schumer!    

Episode 19: WE NEED TO TALK PMT. Plus Royal Wedding.

‘Ooops upside your hips’. Jennie rebrands a classic party tune and how Amy got on DJing at a teenage disco. Ahead of the Royal wedding, concerns over the stability of Harry and Meghan plus why Jennie ended up throwing a curry at a wall. 

Episode 18: AMY ON HOLIDAY WITH THE BECKHAMS

This episode, why I barely recognised Jennie and why she can’t open dishwashers anymore. We see the return of trendy biker clothing and the nob column. Why Jennie won’t work for Radio 4 (this is an explicit ep-AGAIN), why soaps are shit, first kisses and Victoria Beckham spotting. 

Episode 17: BEING ON REALITY TV. With guest Kate Lawler.

This week we’re joined by the brutally honest and hilarious, Kate Lawler. Discussing her journey from becoming the first female Big Brother winner, experiencing instant fame and bizarre offers from newspapers, to social media and laser hair removal. We delve into her time on Love Island, Celebrity Wrestling, RISE and…

Episode 16: HOW MANY PEOPLE WE’VE SLEPT WITH.

This episode sounds terrible. We attempted Skyping and it’s gone terribly wrong, but as Jennie says ‘you’re on our journey’ so you’ll have to endure it with us. Also, why Amy’s going on holiday on her own, how many people we’ve slept with, Jennifer Lawrence coat debate & pit girls. 

Episode 15: PMT PROBLEMS AND SEX MUSIC

Why Amy’s been crying (someone’s had a drink and overshares). The staggering reason Jennie & Amy didn’t become dancers, Oprah Winfrey, and Sex music. Happy Valentines Blondies! 

Episode 14: DRINKING IN JANUARY. With guest Danni Menzies.

In this weeks episode we aim to inspire. Not with our chat about our lack of participation in dry January, but with our special guest, TV & radio presenter, Danni Menzies. How Danni went from being riddled with anxiety and agoraphobia, to landing one of the best TV jobs in…

Episode 13: CHRISTMAS SPECIAL. A shocking secret Santa.

Our special festive edition! Jennie presents Amy with the greatest ever secret santa, what makes Amy cry every New Years Eve, plus don’t listen if you’re friends with Paul McCartney, drink pumpkin spiced lattes and get excited by the Coca Cola van.

Episode 12: MAKING FRIENDS AS AN ADULT

Investigating why Jennie’s turning into Avril Lavigne, Amy attempts to be trendy, making friends in your thirties and is it a myth that men are the messier sex? Plus what Jennie does with cutlery is going to baffle you. 

Episode 11: GOING BRA-LESS. Amy’s moved to London. And changed.

It’s the first episode of Season 2 and much has changed! We catch up after an 8 week break to see if Amy has turned a bit ‘London’, why Jennie isn’t wearing a bra, cupping, hedgehog hospitals and the decline of the Kardashians. 

Episode 10: MARRIAGE PRESSURES

Another nudity/massage incident, embarrassing Amy’s boyfriend at work and the pressures of getting married in your 30’s. Plus LOTS more.

Episode 9: STARTING A NEW JOB. And a nudist holiday.

‘Maybe you had tense buns’. Amy has a new job, Jennies laugh is making waves, sexy massages and the power of change. 

Episode 8: THE ONE WHERE WE COULDN’T STOP LAUGHING

What Amy’s Mum does with nail varnish is extraordinary, as is what Jennie’s Mum thinks of Netflix. Spiders are dickheads and Amy has a shower cap revelation. 

Episode 7: THE MAN WHO GOT NAKED ON NATIONAL TV

Why would you go on National TV naked? We asked Cassius from Naked Attraction. Plus; Donald Trump impressions, an issue at the seaside and Fan Fiction fears. 

Episode 6: THE EPISODE WHERE WE ENDED UP JUST TALKING ABOUT ‘FRIENDS’

Once again we get lost in pants chat as Amy’s underwear journey has a breakthrough. Why genitalia is so badly labelled (involves graphic language). We’ll explain leg prisons, what a Gussip is and what happens when you’re in the same room as one of the cast members of ‘Friends’. 

Episode 5: EMOTIONAL OUTFIT DECISIONS

This week we discuss unsupported chests, fake tan, how our emotions are responsible for our outfit choices and why we both look like a ‘thoughtless mess’ 

Episode 4: REALITY TV

Why we’re obsessed with mind numbing television, underwear adjustments and why Jennie sits down in the shower. Warning-This podcast contains explicit body part chat. 

Episode 3: INSTAGRAM IS MAKING US GO MAD

Why Instagram is making us all look insane. Evidence that Rihanna is greasy. And suspicions that Jennie’s Mum is Beyonce. 

Episode 2: BEING BIKINI READY

Discussing being ‘bikini ready’ and why Jennie is blacklisted at Slimming Clubs. 

Episode 1: AN HONEST INTRODUCTION

Our inaugural episode. We wanted to give you an intro about us, what we’ll be talking about and what we’re into, but it spiralled pretty quickly into a shocking revelation about Jennies age, an extraordinary use of a McFlurry and why we think Jon Bon Jovi is insecure.